March 4, 2010

Identity Crisis

We leave Mississippi tomorrow. I'm exhausted.

Plus, I'm feeling sort of forgotten. Even my dad has hardly texted me the past few days. My family seems to have forgotten my name (I've been called every name EXCEPT Holly - even HARVEY, the dog). It's almost like everyone is moving around me and no one is listening and no one is noticing. We tried to watch the school production of Little Women tonight. No one paid any attention. Everyone was rushing about going "Yea, yea, that's nice." The only song they sat down for was Clare's and while I love Clare and her incredible voice it still hurt to feel like my family really didn't care that much.

I'm glad I got to see Pawpaw. Pearson may be crazy but he can be really sweet. Beaty is not as bad as everyone makes her out to be. Aunt B is lovable in that way only aunts can be. But I would like to stick out to someone. I don't want to just be that good, reliable kid that can just be walked over. I will always be her, but sometimes it wears on me.

I know that I mean something to Jackson. He's had a rough week and is awfully stressed and below average on the cheerfulness scale, but at least he knows me name. That counts for a lot right now.

I'm terribly sorry for complaining. I just needed to get my thoughts out.

See you in Colorado.

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